Broken things, broken heart, broken soul, broken spirit...anything broken I feel inclined to fix. I wish I have that kind of ability and capability but I could only try and could only do so much. Some people may find it bizarre but I have always been fascinated by anything broken and gets challenged to fix it. I have had success at times but on other occasions, I ended up breaking it some more. There is something so fulfilling and gratifying about fixing something that I could not find anywhere else. I feel triumphant and jubilant when I am able to repair, restore or revive something.
I am unsure where this fascination came from but Angus MacGyver, the main character of the long-time defunct TV show "MacGyver" may have influenced me. He was an intelligent, optimistic, laid-back and resourceful secret agent who preferred non-violent resolution over aggression. It was hypnotic watching him get out of a dismal situation by making do with what he could find. I was pretty disappointed when the show stopped airing but it created a "MacGyver" in me.
I remember having a broken clock at home and dismantling it to try to revive it. I didn't have the slightest idea about the mechanics of a clock but I put my hands to work by carefully pulling out its "heart" and hands. I then removed its face and took the gears out. I laid every piece on the table and just stared at them--not knowing where to start. I cautiously fiddled with them, checking what could be wrong. For a few hours, I engrossed myself in putting the pieces back together but to my dismay, it still did not work. And my only consolation was the fact that I was able to put all the parts together.
My "fixation" on fixing things did not end there. There were several occasions when friends would call me up to fix something for them. I'm no expert in any given field but my willingness and optimism drive me to finding a solution to the problem. I always envision anything can be reverted, if not to its original state, at least to a functioning one.
A couple of amusing instances stand out when I was able to fix something. One day, my car stereo and clock stopped working when I unplugged a device from the cigarette lighter. I had no idea what happened and so I hopped on my computer and did a Google search. The results pinpointed to having a blown fuse. With no proper tools to use, I armed myself with nail clippers and tweezers.
The first hour was spent figuring out how to open the fuse box in the hood to get the spare fuse and then, finding the fuse box under the dashboard where the blown fuse was located. When I finally found it and got to open it, I was startled by the number of fuses inside and was clueless which one needed to be replaced. So I called the car manufacturer to get the information but the unenthusiastic representative would not tell me which one. He instead referred me to their technical support website which charges you a fee so I had to resort to Google again which thankfully gave me the info though I felt stupid after realizing that it was actually engraved on the fuse box cover itself.
The next hour was spent trying to pull the blown fuse out switching between the nail clippers and the tweezers and finding the right position to get to it. After all the crawling and the contortionist moves I did under the dashboard, I felt victorious when I was able to replace the fuse and could not contain myself when I got my car stereo and clock to work. However, I just had to check if the cigarette lighter, which blew the fuse in the first place, was working. I plugged the phone charger in and my rejoicing suddenly vanished into thin air...the fuse blew again! You can just imagine the frustration I felt at that time but thank goodness, I already had first-hand experience replacing one so the second time I did it, I learned my lesson and got the right tool which saved me a lot of time.
Another funny incident happened when my friends and I were preparing ingredients needed for a special dinner the following night. We gathered a bag of shrimp shells after peeling them off. My friend thought of throwing it in the garbage but was worried that it might produce foul odor around the house. So I advised her to just throw them in the disposal and that should take care of it. So she did and it clogged the sink up. I turned the disposal on a few times hoping that it will grind the shells up but to no avail.
I panicked a little bit and asked if they had a sink plunger but they had none. It may be out of desperation but I stuck my hand in the disposal and started pumping the water up and down. I felt some pressure while doing it and thought, "That happens when using a plunger." And just like a plunger, I continued pumping with my hand for a few minutes as my friends watched in probably disgust and disbelief. And holy cow, it worked! I breathed the hugest sigh of relief when there was no trace of shrimp shells left in the sink. My friends and I exploded into laughter and were amazed with what happened. That night, I got labeled as "The Human Plunger" and they summoned me not to do it in the toilet. How absurd!
That is one thing I like about fixing things. It is an adventure, a challenge and it could be a humbling experience. People tend to just throw anything broken without even trying to mend it. For others, the value of something is lost when it gets broken no matter the price they paid for it. If we are unable to restore something for its monetary value, we could at least restore it for its sentimental value which is far more meaningful.
Everyday we come across people who have different stories, who are in different stages and situations in life. We come across people who are broken physically, who are carrying broken hearts, who come from broken families, who have shattered spirits and shattered dreams. Life gets too hectic for a lot of us that we overlook the pain in the face of the person in front of us or hear the anguish in someone's voice.
We may feel that the things we do or say do not have much weight on someone but what matters most is that we tried. Frustration could set in when someone keeps entangling himself in the same situation after all the help you have extended. Intolerance becomes hard to conceal when your advice falls on deaf ears. Understanding becomes hard to cultivate when they ask for your precious time.
We may be ill-equipped and do not have the proper tools in fixing what is broken but we can make do with what we got. When others are crumbling down, we can be there to hold them up. Lending a hand to hold on to can be the only support they need to keep going in life. A listening ear is probably the only thing they ask to feel like they mattered. A few minutes of your time is perhaps all they need to decide whether they should extend their time living.
If we see the value of each broken soul, we will be more than willing to hand them a bottle of glue--the glue of hope, of patience, of faith, of charity, of love...
"Being broken does not necessarily mean the end of everything. Learn to pick up the pieces and put them back together. You may not look the same and may not function like before but the most important thing is that you are whole again." ~Dinah~
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