The Man Who First Loved Me

I was listening to a radio station in the Philippines through live streaming and my eyes welled up in tears as I listened to their topic regarding losing a loved-one and how people coped with it.  The callers narrated their own sad but somehow inspiring stories and I could not help but cry as I related to the grief and pain they went through before and after their loss. It hit me that this month marks the sixth death anniversary of my father--my 'Tatay'. All the memories I had with him flooded over me. And I cried some more, trying to hold back my tears and sniffles to avoid drawing attention from my co-workers.

It had been six years since the last time I went home.  It was a bittersweet homecoming since the sole purpose of it was to attend the funeral of my father--to pay him my last respect and to take a final glimpse of him. He was already battling with cancer for a couple of years and I knew that I did not have much time to spend with him so I booked a trip home in November  of 2004 hoping that I could spend Christmas with him and the rest of my family. Being away from them for so long, I was ecstatic to see them again...to hug them, laugh with them and share special memories with them. I could not wait to play with my nieces and nephews and see how they've grown. I was counting the days until I could see everyone of them. Aside from the fact that my father was waiting for me to come home.

One cold early morning of October 2004, I saw a voicemail notification on my phone with a registered number from my sister.  I just ended a graveyard shift at 6:00 o'clock that morning. I had the strangest feeling that the call was about my father and I was too scared to listen to the message.  But I did. I could sense the trembling in my sister's voice as she relayed to me that our father has surrendered his battle with cancer. A part of me died as well when it sunk into me that I will never be able to talk to him again when I get back home. That I would not be able to feel his warm hug and share jokes with him. I could not fathom the thought that I would see him lifeless.

I sat in my car for a few minutes enveloped in grief  but no tears coming out of my eyes.  I was coaxing myself  that it was okay and that he was in a better place. I wanted to cry but I couldn't. I felt paralyzed--just numb. I mustered some strength and drove home. I found myself in tears as I laid in bed with no one to talk to. I've never felt so alone but a heartfelt prayer gave me peace and comfort. I was physically and emotionally exhausted when  I finally drifted off to sleep.

I called my sister later that day and found out that 'Tatay' told his good friend that he might not make it before I get home. He was trying to hang on to his dear life so he could see me but his body was too weak and  been wanting to take its final rest. Knowing that, 'Tatay' made me feel so special and loved.  He had never been vocal about how he felt about his children but he had a way of showing his love for us. He may have weaknesses but he was always thoughtful in his own little ways. He would fight for his kids even if it meant jeopardizing himself in the process.

The next few days were spent arranging my flight to the Philippines, taking care of work stuff and packing. Those days were some of the craziest days I've ever had which hardly gave me a chance to wallow in grief. An outpouring of support and sympathy  from friends helped me get through those seemingly endless days.

Finally the day of my flight came and as I was sitting at the airport, I remembered the last time I saw my father.  It was at the airport...on my way to the States. He hardly talked to me that day. He was sitting on the curb with his face down. I kept glancing at him but he didn't even want to look at me. I eventually caught his eyes and in those deep-set brown almond eyes, I could see tears in the corner. There was sadness in them and I looked away for I know that  I would start to cry. I thought he might be sad because he will miss me but maybe he was afraid that he would not see me again...or maybe  he already knew he wouldn't. I wanted to hug him as I bade goodbye to them but unfortunately had to rush to the plane since I was the only passenger not yet on board. All I could do was wave at him.

My father and I had our share of disagreements and disputes but his silent ways of showing his love would definitely not be forgotten. My memories of him carrying me to bed when I was little , playing boardgames with his kids, taking us to amusement parks, giving us change so we could buy candy and so on and so forth would always stay with me. But one important role that I played in his life growing up which I will never, never forget was making him coffee in the morning before going to work and when he gets home from work.   He would then have me grab his slippers and ask for a freshly washed face towel to refresh himself up. That was a usual scenario at home. At that time,  I would murmur and even questioned why it had to be me all the time. But now, I am thankful that I have that memory of my father that is only mine and mine alone.

Remembering 'Tatay' still makes me cry and I know it always will.  However,  having the knowledge that families can be together for eternity gives me hope that I will see him again and I can be reunited with him. I know he is watching over me and is being my guardian angel. If there was one thing that I wished I did while he was still around, that would be to tell him how much I love him. But I could not do it anymore. All I could do is softly whisper "I love you, Tatay" in the air hoping that the wind will carry those words to him wherever he is at right now. 'Tatay' was the very first man in my life who first loved me and showed me unconditional love without expecting anything in return. I surely miss him...

"God presents us with priceless gifts of love, family, friends and other great things that give meaning to our existence. It is up to us to either treasure them, pawn them for a lesser value or trade them for nothing...you decide." ~Dinah~

A Serving of Chicken Soup for My Soul

A couple of Sundays ago, I attended a fireside that was life-changing.  I should have written about it as soon as I got home so I could at least convey the burning of my spirit, at least through words, after listening to Dan Clark, author of the famous book "Chicken Soup for the Soul". What an amazing man and a great speaker he is!

I imagined that the burning feeling I had would immediately subside but it stayed with me. It is a burning feeling to be a better person, a better fellowman, a better disciple of Christ. Keeping that feeling burning is a daily struggle but it won't be impossible if the desire to do so is present where that burning feeling springs from.

I have learned from Dan Clark that serving others which is the essence of the gospel of Jesus Christ allows us to be connected with each other at a higher level. The experiences that we have with others are more meaningful which create more meaningful friendships and relationships. Giving time for others in service, allows us to be more appreciative of what we have and not complain about what we lack. The gospel is not learning to know, it is learning to do. It is an action word--a verb. We demonstrate our love for Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ by lending a helping hand, by reaching out to others even in the simplest and smallest way. It makes a difference--we make a difference.

When we serve others, we are able to find out who we really are. We find our worth, our purpose. We discover who the people we serve really are. We are all children of God. We are one big family. When we realize that, our hearts become open, we become more accepting. Understanding others becomes easier. Our minds work with our hearts to make room for love to share with others. It is in losing ourselves in the service of others that we find ourselves (Mahatma Gandhi).

I do try to make a concerted effort to have a ready hand to help someone no matter who that person is but I am also guilty of being too focused sometimes on what is going on with my life that I overlook the needs of others. Nevertheless, when I do get a chance to serve others, the gratification I get from it is incomparable. It is a great antidote when I am feeling down. It lifts me up when I am able to lift someone else up. The world becomes more beautiful when you are able to add the beauty of your heart and soul to it. That is the power of serving others.


"A drop of kindness can quench the thirst of a dry soul."~Dinah~

Poetic Wednesday

Unraveled
by dinahmic

Affixed to subliminal affection
Indifferent to the vivacity around
Feeling frigid to reason
Traipsing on the edge of delirium

Reality at its bleakest
Cognizance exhausted
Vitality escaped
Existence aimless

Camouflaged by gloom
A glimpse of the azure evaporated
Besieged by melancholy
The milieu bears dimness

Ascended from delusion
Maneuvered back into presence
Beholden to God's grace
Bequeathed with perfect love.

Catching Life's Confetti

Growing up, I was a very shy girl. Okay, may be that's hard to believe now but that is the truth. I used to be very awkward around a lot of people and I was too scared to get out of my shell. I remember not participating in extra-curricular activities in school due to fear of being ridiculed which cost me the highest honors when I completed my elementary education. I hated being in the spotlight so I just concentrated on the academics and thought that was all I needed but obviously, I was wrong. It might not be much of a big deal at that  time since it transpired in the early stages of my education but the feeling of disappointment never left me. And even so, I stayed and remained in my shell.

 I was always playing it safe, always on the sideline, always in the corner. It was where I felt most comfortable, my comfort zone, but it was the most arid zone as well. I was just a plain spectator as gaiety unfolded before me. My voice left unheard as people broke into laughter. I was too afraid to crack a joke thinking it might not be funny. I never became a part of a team's victory nor its defeat. And even in love, I was playing it safe promising myself that my first would be my last to avoid being hurt. Certainly, it did not happen and I was not spared from being heartbroken.

After changing my faith, I gained a new sense of confidence. Gaining new faith in God was gaining new faith in myself. I can still  distinctly recall going to a dance and being very conscious. I finally loosened up after some time and got up the courage to get on the dance floor. However, I  felt clumsy as I swayed my hips to the rhythm of the music and I was about to turn around to go back to my seat when a famous adage came to mind, "Dance like nobody's watching." I found it hard to digest at first but I decided to yield to that thought and I had the best time of my life as I danced the night away. It was a huge "Aha!" moment for me...a life-changing one.

That experience gave me a different outlook in life. I came to a realization that I was actually depriving myself of the fun and joy that life can offer and that I missed out on a lot of things. So I made a pledge to myself to catch whatever life throws at me with both hands. Singing my heart out in front of others is not as nerve-racking even though I know I can never be on "American Idol". Shaking my body in synchrony with the music's beat  became natural though I would definitely not earn a spot on "So You Think You Can Dance".  Not having someone laugh at my silly jokes became the least of my worries and poking fun of myself did not give me discomfort but it absolutely would not qualify me to be "The Last Comic Standing." I engaged in sports with people I barely knew which presented opportunities of establishing new connections. I  picked up new hobbies which broadened my knowledge. I watched performances which enlivened my soul. I traveled to places  and  marveled at the richness of their history. I opened myself up to others  which resulted to earning new friends. I gained a new appreciation for the beauty of nature and its majesty as I communed with it. I was willing to try anything.  

There are still a lot of things that I want to do and I want to try. It may mean another broken heart if I become vulnerable again in love. It may mean a broken bone when I engage myself in physical activities. It may leave me broke when I travel to places. But all these are well-worth every pain I will bear.

There is so much to do and so much to enjoy in life. There are so many possibilities to explore and so many opportunities to grow. There is a plethora of adventures to get on, places to travel, mountains to climb and oceans to cross. Life pours momentous events, special occasions, unforgettable moments, once-in-a-lifetime opportunities, breathtaking views, potential friendships, potential love affairs. And the list goes on.  All these things are the confetti of life  and it is up to you to seize them, to catch life's confetti as they fall on you.

They come in different colors, in different shades and hues, with sparkles and glitters. They come in different shapes and sizes. They're thrown at you from different directions. You have a choice to catch them with arms wide open or let them fall on the ground. If you choose the latter, think twice. It is not too late. Don't just tread on them but pick them up and give yourself a chance to at least even try.

Live a life where regrets have no room. Love like you've never been hurt before. Laugh until you cry. Savor each moment like it's your last. You don't want the  "Should'ves", "Could'ves" and "Would'ves accompany you for the rest of your life for they will not be good companions. Introduce yourself to  "Shoulds", "Coulds" and "Woulds" for they will fill your basket of  life with all the superlatives there is. Life becomes more meaningful, invigorating and worth living. Just try...you might just have the best time of your life.

"Life is a rough road to travel with its numerous bumps and humps. An infinite smooth surface is only reached when life itself ends. So just enjoy the ride and the adventure that comes with it for you may never have a chance to get on it again." ~Dinah~

Fixing Fixation

Broken things, broken heart, broken soul, broken spirit...anything broken I feel inclined to fix. I wish I have that kind of ability and capability but I could only try and could only do so much. Some people may find it bizarre but I have always been fascinated by anything broken and gets challenged to fix it. I have had success at times but on other occasions, I ended up breaking it some more. There is something so fulfilling and gratifying about fixing something that I could not find anywhere else. I feel triumphant and jubilant when I am able to repair, restore or revive something.

I am unsure where this fascination came from but Angus MacGyver, the main character of the long-time defunct TV show "MacGyver" may have influenced me. He was an intelligent, optimistic, laid-back and resourceful secret agent who preferred non-violent resolution over aggression. It was hypnotic watching him get out of a dismal situation by making do with what he could find. I was pretty disappointed when the show stopped airing but it created a "MacGyver" in me.

I remember having a broken clock at home and dismantling it to try to revive it. I didn't have the slightest idea about the mechanics of a clock but I put my hands to work by carefully pulling out its "heart" and hands. I then removed its face and took the gears out. I laid every piece on the table and just stared at them--not knowing where to start. I cautiously fiddled with them, checking what could be wrong. For a few hours, I engrossed myself in putting the pieces back together but to my dismay, it still did not work. And my only consolation was the fact that I was able to put all the parts together.

My "fixation" on fixing things did not end there. There were several occasions when friends would call me up to fix something for them. I'm no expert in any given field but my willingness and optimism drive me to finding a solution to the problem. I always envision anything can be reverted, if not to its original state, at least to a functioning one.

A couple of amusing instances stand out when I was able to fix something. One day, my car stereo and clock stopped working when I unplugged a device from the cigarette lighter. I had no idea what happened and so I hopped on my computer and did a Google search. The results pinpointed to having a blown fuse. With no proper tools to use, I armed myself with nail clippers and tweezers.

The first hour was spent figuring out how to open the fuse box in the hood to get the spare fuse and then, finding the fuse box under the dashboard where the blown fuse was located. When I finally found it and got to open it, I was startled by the number of fuses inside and was clueless which one needed to be replaced. So I called the car manufacturer to get the information but the unenthusiastic representative would not tell me which one. He instead referred me to their technical support website which charges you a fee so I had to resort to Google again which thankfully gave me the info though I felt stupid after realizing that it was actually engraved on the fuse box cover itself.

The next hour was spent trying to pull the blown fuse out switching between the nail clippers and the tweezers and finding the right position to get to it. After all the crawling and the contortionist moves I did under the dashboard, I felt victorious when I was able to replace the fuse and could not contain myself when I got my car stereo and clock to work. However, I just had to check if the cigarette lighter, which blew the fuse in the first place, was working. I plugged the phone charger in and my rejoicing suddenly vanished into thin air...the fuse blew again! You can just imagine the frustration I felt at that time but thank goodness, I already had first-hand experience replacing one so the second time I did it, I learned my lesson and got the right tool which saved me a lot of time.

Another funny incident happened when my friends and I were preparing ingredients needed for a special dinner the following night. We gathered a bag of shrimp shells after peeling them off. My friend thought of throwing it in the garbage but was worried that it might produce foul odor around the house. So I advised her to just throw them in the disposal and that should take care of it. So she did and it clogged the sink up. I turned the disposal on a few times hoping that it will grind the shells up but to no avail.

I panicked a little bit and asked if they had a sink plunger but they had none. It may be out of desperation but I stuck my hand in the disposal and started pumping the water up and down. I felt some pressure while doing it and thought, "That happens when using a plunger." And just like a plunger, I continued pumping with my hand for a few minutes as my friends watched in probably disgust and disbelief. And holy cow, it worked! I breathed the hugest sigh of relief when there was no trace of shrimp shells left in the sink. My friends and I exploded into laughter and were amazed with what happened. That night, I got labeled as "The Human Plunger" and they summoned me not to do it in the toilet. How absurd!

That is one thing I like about fixing things. It is an adventure, a challenge and it could be a humbling experience. People tend to just throw anything broken without even trying to mend it. For others, the value of something is lost when it gets broken no matter the price they paid for it. If we are unable to restore something for its monetary value, we could at least restore it for its sentimental value which is far more meaningful.

Everyday we come across people who have different stories, who are in different stages and situations in life. We come across people who are broken physically, who are carrying broken hearts, who come from broken families, who have shattered spirits and shattered dreams. Life gets too hectic for a lot of us that we overlook the pain in the face of the person in front of us or hear the anguish in someone's voice.

We may feel that the things we do or say do not have much weight on someone but what matters most is that we tried. Frustration could set in when someone keeps entangling himself in the same situation after all the help you have extended. Intolerance becomes hard to conceal when your advice falls on deaf ears. Understanding becomes hard to cultivate when they ask for your precious time.

We may be ill-equipped and do not have the proper tools in fixing what is broken but we can make do with what we got. When others are crumbling down, we can be there to hold them up. Lending a hand to hold on to can be the only support they need to keep going in life. A listening ear is probably the only thing they ask to feel like they mattered. A few minutes of your time is perhaps all they need to decide whether they should extend their time living.

If we see the value of each broken soul, we will be more than willing to hand them a bottle of glue--the glue of hope, of patience, of faith, of charity, of love...

"Being broken does not necessarily mean the end of everything. Learn to pick up the pieces and put them back together. You may not look the same and may not function like before but the most important thing is that you are whole again." ~Dinah~

Poetic Wednesday

As the World Turns
by dinahmic

As the world turns
Life's changes seem arduous to embrace
When it ensnares me unprepared
And acquiescence is all I could muster

As the world is turning
A dreadful emotion of solitude overcomes me
As I gaze at the lines and ridges of my countenance
Wondering if the hands of time turned hastily on me

As the world takes another turn
A revived hope flourished in me
Optimism blossomed as I welcome
what life bestows upon me

Beauty of an innocent soul is perceived
Fortitude sprouting from pain is borne
Tolerance from injustices is acquired
Wisdom from failures is reaped

A tinge of light in darkness becomes apparent
Shades and hues of understanding become vivid
Love predominates in all of life's abstraction
And the world turns into a better place.

"Desire the delights of life because heaven might just deliver"~Dinah~

Gastronomic Indulgence

If there is one thing that I could say I've always been in love with, that would be FOOD. Personally, I think it is the best thing ever been invented. Not only does it sustain the human physical life but the emotional life as well. It has power to create relationships, strengthen existing ones, bind friendships, comfort those in emotional distress. Celebrating life's greatest occasions and triumphs are not the same without the presence of food. It is one thing that will keep you company no matter what state you are in. Well, of course, that will also depend if you have budget for it but for me, that is out of the question since again, I am in love with it and I don't have the heart to refuse it.

To solidify my relationship with food, I have decided to try different cuisines from different countries and regions. So I made a pact to try anything pertaining to food. It would be my quest now to go restaurant hopping, to get out of the box and take a bite or two of their specialty. I would make it a point that if I travel to places, I would establish a connection with that particular place by having a plate of the cuisine they are noted for. I think it is a great way to appreciate culture, accept our differences and incorporate those differences into our lives to be well-rounded people. It is a wonderful means of embracing humanity.

I have a developing sophisticated palate and it is definitely a burgeoning one that is ready to explore the endless possibilities out there when it comes to food. Some would be succulent and some would be dry. Some would be scrumptious and some would be unsavory. Some would be delectable and some would just be plain horrible. Gastronomically indulging myself will be an adventure and I am prepared to take on the challenge that accompanies it. Not knowing what it would taste like can be unnerving but when you get to taste something that gives you a different high, is delightfully amusing. After all, it only takes one chance to make a decision to either hate it or love it.

My tummy is growling as I think about food. Now, off I go to McDonald's...not! Alright, I'm just gonna go rummage through my fridge and cook something up...hard-boiled eggs, anyone?

"Eat to fill your physical needs, Pray to fill your spiritual needs, Love to fill your emotional needs. Eat, pray, love while you can for you know not what tomorrow brings." ~by Dinah~

Desiderata-My Mantra

Desiderata which means "desired things" is a poem I consider as my life's mantra. I have always been fascinated by this poem since the very first time I read it in my teenage years. I fell in love with it as I slowly read each line and reflected on its meaning. Striving to be a good person is a daily struggle and the inspiring words in the poem help to keep me grounded and put everything into perspective. So I have it up on my cubicle at work to remind me of how I should conduct myself. If you haven't had a chance to read the poem, I've inserted it below. Take time and make time to read it and ponder on its meaningful words. You might just have that elusive "Aha!" moment.

Go placidly amid the noise and haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible without surrender
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons,
they are vexatious to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain and bitter;
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.

Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs;
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals;
and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself.
Especially, do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love;
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment
it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe,
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be,
and whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful.
Strive to be happy.

~Written by Max Ehrmann in the 1920's~

Spiritually Charged!

As a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I always look forward to April and October every year since those are the months when our Church leaders speak to the members in a global scope. Church leaders share messages that inspire us to be better daughters and sons, better husbands and wives, better brothers and sisters, better friends, better people. We are reminded of who we are, of the things we should focus on and of our potential as children of a loving God.

In the midst of this chaotic world, it is always delightful to get an opportunity to stop, listen and refocus on the most important things. And over the weekend, I had that opportunity and got my spiritual battery recharged.

I woke up Saturday morning right before the conference started. I turned the TV on and was greeted with a beautiful hymn rendered by the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. I settled myself on my bed and indulged in the uplifting messages being shared. The power of the words penetrated my soul and I felt the spirit so strongly that from time to time brought tears to my eyes. Pres. Dieter Uchtdorf's message left a huge impression on me because it was very timely and it was imperative that everyone heard it. I think the last two parts below of his talk best summed it all up.

"Strength comes not from frantic activity but from being settled on a firm foundation of truth and light. It comes from placing our attention and efforts on the basics of the restored gospel of Jesus Christ. It comes from paying attention to the divine things that matter most.

"Let us simplify our lives a little. Let us make the changes necessary to refocus our lives on the sublime beauty of the simple, humble path of Christian discipleship — the path that leads always toward a life of meaning, gladness, and peace." ~Pres. Dieter Uchtdorf~

Sunday came and I had to get up a little early for another day of General Conference. My friends and I headed to Temple Square where members from different parts of the world and from all walks of life gathered to watch and listen. We attended both the morning and afternoon sessions and had a relaxing and enjoyable lunch picnic of pot roast and crepes for dessert in between. The weather was warm which was pretty unusual in October but nothing to complain about since we had the beautiful capitol building as our backdrop with the tree branches swaying as the wind blew and having picnic with great friends was priceless.

Pres. Thomas S. Monson's message about gratitude stood out to me. The impact of his words could not have been more powerful as the spirit bore witness of its truthfulness. It may be a simple principle but it is something that people tend to ignore. Sometimes I overlook what I have and look for what I don't have. I forget to be grateful for the blessings I am able to enjoy and the knowledge that Heavenly Father is aware of my needs. Pres. Monson's message was a wake up call and below is an excerpt of that message:

"We can lift ourselves, and others as well, when we refuse to remain in the realm of negative thought and cultivate within our hearts an attitude of gratitude."

"If ingratitude be numbered among the serious sins, then gratitude takes its place among the noblest of virtues. Someone has said that gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all others ~Pres. Thomas S. Monson~

I find it interesting that Pres. Uchtdorf's message about simplifying our lives is directly correlated with Pres. Monson's message about having an attitude of gratitude. Simply put that if we have gratitude for simple things, we would be content, appreciate things more and love people more because we are able to make room for the more important things.

Writing and Me

I wish I have a cool story about starting my own blog but I do not. I woke up one morning and checked my Facebook account when someone posted that she felt inspired to start her own blog (thanks to Carla). Then, I thought to myself, why don't I start my own blog since I have a lot of wisdom to impart, stories to tell and my life is very exciting--NOT! 

All I could say is that I suddenly got inspired to write and felt like letting my emotions float in the world of blogging . I have always had interest in writing but I have a love-hate relationship with it. A very strong desire to write has long resided in me and it gets to me when I have the urge to write about something but my creative juices do not seem to flow and my reservoir is all dried up. It necessitates an inspiration to get fueled up and once that happens, I could not seem to restrain myself and words flow like a mountain stream. I am a novice and still have a lot to learn along the way but the only way to be good at something is by doing it repeatedly until you have mastered it. And if  not, until you are better at it.

My love of writing started when I was but a young girl in grade school. I would get excited when my teacher would ask us to write an essay or a narrative about a certain topic. I probably did not even think much about its effect on me at that time but looking back, it was an electrifying experience. Playing with words was like playing with toys.

Writing has a liberating effect on me and has power to either bring me back to reality or take me to a world where everything is and can be possible.There is something about it that is relaxing not to mention a good way to release all the bottled up emotions--its highs and lows.

If there is an excruciating part about writing, that would be coming up with a catchy introduction. However, getting wonderful comments from people who took the time to read my writing is the most rewarding and the not-so-wonderful comments are definitely not ignored but taken as a motivation to improve and improvise. When you are able to touch someone's life because of the inspiration you are able to share through your writing, that is priceless and that is my ultimate goal.

I do hope that by starting this blog, my love-hate relationship with writing will blossom into a  love affair that can withstand any battles, any headache I will go through and any demons I have to face.  After all, we only have each other.